Do you ever feel this way?
I feel it on the reg, whenever I'm stressed or the general level of anxiety is up a notch (or twenty.) I have ideas, things I want to talk about but when I sit down to write (a post or even an email to a friend), I've got nothing. If you've been reading here for any length of time, you already KNOW this about me, which makes even [the whining] the description irrelevant.
The list of things that are currently stressing me out is short. There are two items:
1) Going to Blogher
2) Having another baby
I am beyond excited to go to BlogHer. I really am. The reason it's stressing me out is because I'm always a little stressed as a travel date approaches (I have a case of a self-identified disorder called Travel Anxiety) and also because I've never, ever been away from my girl for that long. (You can roll your eyes, really, it's okay. I KNOW.)
I know (KNOW!) she's going to be fine. She will be with The Man (who I am SURE is, heh, going to enlist the help of [even homeless people off the streets if he has to] family and our sitter). My kid going to live/survive/go on/get fed/semi-bathed (let's be for real) and although her clothes won't match and her hair will be a knotty mess when I see her, she's going to be OKAY. Really, I am aware.
It's just, you know, my first time away and it stings a little. I'm keeping my mind focused on the things I'm excited about (Going through airport security ALONE! Reading on the plane! Meeting people! Trying to stay up past 8pm!) and also on things that I'm NOT going to miss, like planning [every fucking morsel that passes between her lips] meals and [wet, naked, lubed up, alligator wrangling] bath time/bed routine. When I'm able to do that, I want to leave a day early and stay a day longer.
The other thing, you know, having another baby--we'll leave that [elephant in the room] for another post.
I've forgotten everything I wanted to say about that, anyway.