My Excuse, Signed By No One.

Oh, Internets.  Oh, my.

I have been sick.  SICK.  And The Littlest New Girl has been SICK.  SIIIIICK.

I have no intention of breaking my vow to no one about writing detailed sick posts, so fear not.  I skeeve sick posts (no offense) because, I think, I am too empathic for them.  They make me feel, well, ill when I read them.

Anyway, let's just say that the virus was a swift and merciless motherfucker that left me completely unable to perform any activity at ALL except the *activities of sickness.*  Which obviously excludes ANY and ALL parenting activities. 

And speaking of empathy I seriously, SERIOUSLY don't know how you single parents do it, I really don't.  I have a supportive and capable partner (who, incidentally had to skip his beloved game that day.  And he didn't complain once.  For real. That's love, right?) and it was still awful.  Traumatizing, even.  I also don't know how mothers (or fathers) who are really sick-sick, with more than a motherfucker virus, do it.  I don't.  I know that you do what you have to do but, lord.

It made me recall the horrible pregnancy plagues and had me thinking more than several times, 'Hmm. Maybe one isn't so bad.  I could probably be happy with one,' because doing that everyday for like, a MILLION MONTHS?  I don't know.

I shouldn't be thinking about any of this right now anyway.  I'm mostly on the mend and TLNG is as well (knock wood or whatever you're supposed to do there.)  The Man, however, is not faring so well.  He came home early to help me but ended up getting sick and is now, as they say, SICK. 

I am also left with The Tail-End Of Sickness Malaise.  Which has happened to me ever since my mom died.  It's a weird combination of loneliness and homesickness.  With a side of being on the verge of tears all the time.  It feels like I want to call her, my mom.  I want her to know how much I'm suffering and I want her to feel bad for me.  Even long distance, no one feels bad for you like your mom does.  At least mine did.  She was super-good at it.  And I really, really miss that.  The comfort that only a mom can give.

The fact that I'm now comforting my own baby who will probably grow accustomed to my style of comforting, who will grow to want and need it, does a little bit to ease the ache.  It makes me feel like part of a bigger whole.  Like a link in the chain of mothers nurturing and comforting daughters.  It makes me feel like the circle of life and all that shit.

But still.  I want my Mommy.

Comments

[Jenny, Bloggess]

Sometimes I suspect my husband is lacing my cereal with flu virus so I'll never divorce him but then I remember that I don't eat cereal.

[well read hostess]

I can't be your mommy, but I can attempt to validate you with shiny things.

I gave you an award.

Feel better.

[Krissa]

I am SO sorry you guys are sick! Hope you are back on the mend soon!
Oh, love the new page layout thingy!

[kristen Catrabone]

I'm so sorry you are sick. I am sorry that I have not called you yet with a date to come visit too. I'm thinking of you, hope that you feel all better soon. xoxox Kristen

[Vicki]

OMG!! Are you sure you're not camped out at my house right now? Both my boys got sick one right after the other and then I caught it too. I have to get up and go to work though because I'm saving my time off for vacation and I can't burn it. DAMN. I totally called my mommy this morning for some sympathy and I got offered dinner tonight!! I don't know what I'll do when my mommy isn't there for me to call. I will be miserable.

[Clink]

Holy crap, it never goes away does it? That loss.
Nothing makes me want my mommie more than illness...and the lack of her always makes me feel sicker and very much alone.

[Andrea]

I'm so sorry a plague has descended upon you and yours. I hope everyone is feeling better soon and you're back to your usual hilarious hijinks.

In the meantime, I've invited you to dinner at my place (http://littlebalddoctors.wordpress.com/2008/08/11/party-of-eleven-youre-table-is-available/) and I hope you can make it. Don't worry about making everyone else sick. It's just a virtual dinner. But I want to pick your brraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnn. Ew, that sounded like I'm sick. Sorry 'bout that.

[Bon]

my mom isn't really much good when i'm sick, but i still crave her sympathy. and i can imagine how lonely it would feel to not be able to pick up the phone and get me a dose of that.

hoping you feel better soon, and sending lots of proxy mom sympathy, poor substitute though it may be.

[The Domestic Goddess]

Oh dear, oh dear...I hope you feel much better, soon. There ain't nothing worse, because MOMS AREN'T ALLOWED TO BE SICK!

[Motherhood Uncensored]

Ugh dude. It's one thing to be sick. Another to be sick with a sick kiddo.

xo

[jonniker]

I always want my mom when I'm sick or scared. Always.

(Also, as a person who is in the throes of the pregnancy-related vomit-fest, I feel for you. And at this moment in time, as I hover over the toilet hourly, I'm not sure I can fathom more than one kid. Or at least more than one PREGNANCY.)

[Miss Grace]

We single parents have a really shitty time of it some of the time, and getting sick is one of those times. But I hope you're feeling better.

[anne nahm]

*hugs* You make me want to go and hug my mom with this post. I hope you feel better soon. Thinking good thoughts for you.

[Manic Mommy]

My mom's a nurse and whenever I was sick and she'd take my temperature (old fashioned/three minute/mercury thermometer), she'd sit on the edge of my bed, hold my wrist and explain she was taking my pulse like she did with her patients. It was the most soothing touch in the world. I hope my boys feel the momminess that I try to project when they're sick.

I hope your malaise and all other maladies are gone quickly. You know TLNG only wanted you because you're the mommy.

[Keila]

I am so sorry you feel that way - here is a very big big hug from NJ....

My mom has not passed away but she is in Florida and we are both deathly afraid to fly - so you can imagine how often we see eachother. I miss her so much sometimes.

I wish there was something better I can tell you. BUT I can't.

GOOD news is that my cousin had a horrific first pregnancy like AWFUL, AWFUL delivery, AWFUL post delivery... She even got Marsa (?) on her breast from the hospital. IT WAS AWFUL... She is now pregnant with the 2nd little baby - 7 months in and she has yet to even get morning sickness:)

Chin Up
K

[Amanda]

I don't have a mom, either, and I know JUST. HOW. YOU. FEEL. You're singing my song, lady.

Btw? It helps me when I'm having my sessions with good ol' Thunder Bucket if I hug something. Like, whatever. A towel, a pillow, the cat (I don't seriously do that only because I don't actually have a cat...) so... if that helps.

[Amanda]

I can totally relate to that whole post. Rest easy though. When you're pregnant they'll give you a pill to stop that. I lived on them for my 2nd pregnancy. Are there super cooties out there. I swear we have spent about 2 whole months in 2008 where everyone in the household was completely healthy.

[Astarte]

Ohhh, siiick suuucks. I, too, want someone to feel sorry for me when I'm sick. In fact, that's how I can tell I'm getting sick in the first place - I get teary and want attention. Sad how we all revert, isn't it?

[Mary O]

I always want my mom when I'm sick too. It's like, who's going to take care of meeeeee?

[Erica]

Since I don't have a mom either, maybe we can be surrogate moms for each other when we're sick.

My mom always used to buy me a coloring book and green (lime) gatorade. When I'm sick now, I have to get my own gatorade.