The New Girl(ese)

**NOW UPDATED WITH ANSWERS**

I imagine that you all are pretty much just like me.  (That is it's own brand of crazy, I know, but we can talk about that later.)  For the purposes of this post, I'm imagining that you (like me) have lots of nick-names for things and that you make up your own words and phrases and that these have meaning only within your circle of close ones.

You do that, right?

Here are some of my favorites.  Care to take a guess at what they mean?  If that seems just too labor intensive for a post for goddsakes and you just wanted to passively read, not actively be quizzed, for cryin' out loud, just tune back in and I'll give you the answers in an updated post.

If you've got some time to kill and you'd like to play along, C'MON!!

Define:

1. Kirk-Out (verb) [there's some debate to whether this is original or not]
2. McNuggeter (noun)
3. Mouth Fart (noun)
4. Digger (verb)

In what situation might you say the following?

1. "Beh-beh."
2. "If it was up your ass you'd know."
3. "That's how the cat got out of the basement."

All right.  Get going!  I'll meet you back here with the answers soon.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Okay.  This was SO much fun for me.  If you have your own lingo, you have to write a post on it and then link to it because I want to play too!

Define:

1. To Kirk-Out: (Heather and Clink together had the correct answer, which is) to Freak out in an overly dramatic fashion in the style of James Kirk, Capt of the Starship Enterprise.  Think "DAMN IT, BONES!"  This is used to illustrate an over the top reaction of gigantic or ridiculous proportion.  If it's really bad, you need to add a 'the fuck' to the middle.  Like this: 'The Littlest New Girl Kirked the fuck Out when I was changing her onesie today.
2. McNuggeter: An incredibly un-PC way of describing a person.  Like this: 'How was that mom's group you went to?'  'It was okay but there were a lot of McNuggeters there.'  To give you a *picture,* the term McNuggeter suggests that the person is reminiscent of someone whose job it would be to punch out the little McNugget shapes from the giant slabs of McNugget Meat at the McDonald's factories.  Not nice, I know.
3. Mouth Fart:  Kat was the closest with burp but a Mouth Fart is it's own kind of event.  It is a foul, nasty, smelly belch that comes from the depths of a certain *The Man's* stomach.  I am intensely disgusted by this and so christened them 'Mouth Farts.'  And why, oh why, to they always smell like salami??  The Man doesn't even eat salami.  Sorry if I put you off your dinner/breakfast.
4. Digger:  Clink and Jen were the rightest.  I never heard of 'taking a Digger,' though.  Around here you 'do a Digger,' as in: 'What the hell happened to your shoulder?'  'Oh.  I did a total Digger yesterday.'  It usually means falling face/head first.  Ass over tea kettle and all that.

In what situation might you say the following:

1. 'Beh-beh': You say it, in italics, after someone says something that is innocuous but could have another, more sexual meaning.  Like the other day at the hair salon, the stylist yelled across the room, 'You can start blowing The New Girl now,' to which I added, 'beh-beh.'  It goes like that for anything remotely sexual and trust me, it is fucking hilarious.  You won't be able to stop.  'Give me that banana.'  Beh-beh.  'This bread is hard.'  Beh-beh.  'I want the buns toasted.'  Beh-beh.
2. 'If it was up your ass you'd know.'  Manic Mommy was close.  Flutter and Clink (What?  Are you looking in my windows, Clink?  Have you tapped my phones?)  got it exactly right.  For whatever reason (I don't really get it either) it is the response to ANY question that starts, 'Where is...' or 'Have you seen my....'  Seeing as the ass is an inconvenient, uncomfortable and less-than-desirable storage area (outside of jails, rehabs or psych units) I imagine that someone would know if his remote was up his ass, although the implied suggestion that the ass would somehow be a reasonable place to keep track of said lost item seems, well, a little impractical. (Again, sorry if you're eating.)
3. 'That's how the cat got out of the basement.'  This is what you say to [your husband] a person who is doing something [like fucking around with the basement door] that will cause an obvious negative consequence [like letting the cat out of the basement when your mother is having a party and expressly tells you she wants the cat IN the basement] and yet because [he] this person believes, despite all warning to the contrary [that he is wicked-super-lightning-fast and much faster than the cat, who is old and supposedly arthritic], that the consequence is super unlikely, goes ahead and [watches as the cat streaks by, a whipping, gray blur, arthritis my ass] does the obviously dumb thing anyway.  Which is when you say, 'You know, that's exactly how the cat got out of the basement.'  Taking off wall paper with a blow-torch?  Next to a curtain?  'That is SO how the cat got out of the basement, dude.'

Okay.  Now you.  And I'm dying to know what 'ass-mice' are.

Comments

[Heather360]

I was silly-proud to have guessed one correctly! Love the others, especially the cat one. (Our own stock phrase is, "What's the worst that can happen?" in reference to a friend going out sailing after saying those very words and having a series of misadventures that ended up with a banged-up boat.)

[Mrs. Chicky]

I'm dying! Mouth farts! Perfect. And why do they always smell like salami?

Oh, and up here in New England (beh beh) we say "take a digger". But we're weird like that.

[erica]

I am so in love with you for "Kirk the fuck Out."

[Kristen]

Isn't BEH-BEH a direct quote from Austin Powers?

I et the beh-beh.

[Clink]

bahahaha That just made my day! I am crying from laughing so hard! The definition of Mcnuggeter is brilliant and honestly the cat thing is SO my life (X3).
..and crap, I guess I am not nearly as stealthy as I was pre-preggers...That WAS me in the window!
I'll do mine!

[mothergoosemouse]

Between the mouth farts, up your ass, and the cat getting out of the basement, I think we married the same guy.

[Swistle]

Ha ha ha ha ha! I read it with answers--got here too late to take the quiz. I am totally adding "that's how the cat got out of the basement" to the family lexicon.

[b*babbler]

My brain is completely unfunctional, and it looks like most people ahead have actual working brains so I'll just ride their coattails.

Can't wait to see the answers though!

[Sarah at In the Trenches of Mommyhood]

"Took a digger" = fell down. That was the only one I knew fer sure.

Our favorite cutesy kid word in the Trenches is "unders" for underwear. Hubby and I have both slipped and referred to our own undergarmets as "unders" before...sweet.

[Jen]

No wait, is a digger a fall. As in; He took a digger.

See, I told you this is bugging me!!!

[Jen]

Of course this has been bugging me all day... Is a digger like a tosser?

[Heather360]

1. Kirk-Out (verb): Maybe acting in an overly dramatic fashion. Or perhaps trying to sing when other people could hear you, and you'd really be better to be alone (think "Mr. Tamborine Man")

2. McNuggeter: Someone who eats a lot of fast food.

3. Mouth Fart: Along the lines of Kelly Bundy saying, "Oh, when I think this way other people can hear me."

4. Digger: Digger around in the pants pockets to see if there's any spare change for the laundry, or coffee, or whatever.

1. "Beh-beh." Well, we use this as an affectation for "Baby", as in, "The beh-beh says that it is time for dinner. Again. For the 8th time."

2. "If it was up your ass you'd know." You'll know when you know.

3. "That's how the cat got out of the basement." At the end of a long story? Shaggy dog type?

[Clink]

Kirk-Out: The obvious in my leans towards Star Trek but you don't strike me as obvious. Freak out?
McNuggeter: heh I have to go with turd too
Mouth Fart: Saying something at the worst possible time
Digger: Falling face first

"Beh-beh." When stumbling drunk and having just taken a digger.
"If it was up your ass you'd know." We use this one and it always when a question starts with "where is..."
"That's how the cat got out of the basement" hahaha no ideas.

Our fav at home is 'assmice'

[mothergoosemouse]

Yep. I smell what you're cooking.

(Have I told you how glad I am that you're posting regularly again?)

[Phoenix]

I don't have enough brain cells today to play along, but I am cracking up.

[flutter]

"where is my other shoe?"

"If it was up your ass you'd know"

[Tracy]

I don't understand "If it was up your ass, you'd know," but my husband says it ALL THE TIME, so it must mean something.

[the new girl]

Manic Mommy: As a purloiner myself, I welcome you to 'borrow' this idea.

Post it and then let us all know so we can play!

[kat]

Kirk out: bye
McNuggetter: a small turd?
Mouth Fart: burp
Digger: wedgie
Beh-Beh: baby
If it was up your ass you'd know: sarcastic way of saying why dont you know?
That's how the cat got out of the basement: I got nothin.

Mine:
Are you new here? (meaning, you should know that about me by now; VERY sarcastic)
I bullshit you not! (said very strongly, self explanatory)

[Manic Mommy]

I've been thinking of something similar. Mind if I purloin the idea?

Here are my answers:

Kirk out - Has to be a Star Trek reference. Ending conversation/when you're gonna get back to someone with an update.

McNuggeter - I'll go with Jen and say a small child.

Mouth Fart - When you blurt out something (usually followed by "was that out loud?"

Digger - Verb? Hmm.

Beh-beh - Said quasi-lovingly to The Man. See Seinfeld's "Shmoopie."

If it was up your ass you'd know - When The Man can't find the remote or other 'in front of your face' item.

That's how the cat got out of the basement - When you tell a long involved story (and possibly lose the point by the end?).

[Jen]

OK, since my people are currently occupied with the ever-so-annoying- Higgly Town Heroes, I'll take a stab at it:

Kirk-Out- Never heard it before but my initial thought is that it has something to do with Captain Kirk, like wearing a skin tight shirt and spray painting your legs black. That, or something like, "back-out"?

McNuggeter- someone who eats a lot of McNuggets? A small child?

Mouth Fart- Something that you just say, whether you intended to or not?

Digger- ??

"Beh-beh."- When you don't give a crap?

"If it was up your ass you'd know." - When something is obvious?

"That's how the cat got out of the basement."- When you've done something naughty?